*Note – Ryan and I decided to start this blog for us to be able to look back and see all that has transpired and how God has worked and to also hopefully one day show our child our part of their journey. So this post especially is for us to remember one of those moments that gave us a little more understanding into the little man we have in our home now.
Wednesday night our neighbor asked if we wanted to borrow a bike for little man (it had training wheels on it and everything, just what he needed), we said YES! and were very thankful because we do have getting him a bike in the works but it just hasn’t happened yet (another wonderful story of God’s provision). So we tucked it away in the garage because we knew showing him at 8:30 p.m. wouldn’t be very wise parenting ;).
Thursday I stopped after work and picked up a helmet and I was beyond excited to see him ride his “borrowed” bike that night. I got home and put the helmet aside until it was time to reveal the new “toy”. Little man was sitting on my lap and I said “hey buddy, someone gave us something special for you to use for a little bit, our neighbor gave us a bike for you to ride”. His face dropped and he looked as if he was going to cry…Ryan and I looked at each other, we couldn’t understand because he had mentioned a bike several times and had even wanted to ride when Ryan had taken him to another neighbors house that has several little boys. Ryan said “hey, what’s wrong, what are you thinking?” He said “I already have a bike, my bike is at my other mom’s (his former foster mom) house and it goes faster than this bike and it has red on it (red is his favorite color).” My heart just broke and I couldn’t hold back the tears, this poor little guy, only 5 years old has experienced so much change, so much trauma, so much heartache…way more than any child should have to go through. Ryan talked with him and showed him the positive of riding the “borrowed” bike and then told him where he could find his helmet. When I was looking at helmets there were so many to choose from but my eye kept going to a red and black one, I am thankful that is what I bought because he was so excited that his helmet had red on it.
There was a very happy ending to the borrowed bike, he road for an hour and a half and laughed and had such a good time, at that point he didn’t care that it wasn’t the bike he had before, he was just thrilled to be outside riding bike.
They tell you in training that things like will probably happen to try to help you prepare for what could happen when a child deals with these types of changes, etc but to hear it in training and to experience it are two totally different things. I was just so sad for him because even something as simple as a borrowed bike brought things back to his mind of what he had been used to. I was sad for him that he has had to live in different homes and adjust and adapt to new people, new surroundings and new toys. But the sadness quickly turned to joy when he was riding his bike and singing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, at that point he didn’t have a care in the world.